There’s this hill out on route 3 in NJ, where you come up on it rather suddenly, which is amazing on its own. I came from a city, well a state, that had no elevation. No ups and downs. Its beautiful to have ups and downs, something to match your mood swings, your experiences with fast service coffee and something to match your emotions. In my last state of residence there was just flat land on the landscape as far as the eye can see. So you come up on this hill, gliding on 4 wheels, then you reach the peak of it… to be faced with a brilliant skyline. NYC is hanging out there. Chilling. Just oblivious to its stunning radiance. All nonchalant. Lights creat symphonies amongst the buildings, your heart can almost beat to the melody of it if you closed your eyes and let it sink it.
It’s a beauty.
Yet it does not compare to the day my life was introduced to the idea of a woman with family values and a heart of gold. The day my heart knew there was a Jessica. The moment my mind discovered her. I wasn’t easy to get, without prying some layers of my “onion” back to reveal what I had inside. I hid behind stupid walls. She didn’t have to peel anything, she saw me at face value, for exactly what I was worth and saw me for exactly who I was, wanted to be and could be. I was nervous, pretty nervous, I dressed myself in a black colored shirt, jeans and boots that weren’t even mine the day we first officially met in person. I saw her walking my direction in between the shades of the trees in the darkness of night. I saw her walk, her smile and her radiance. I had met Jessica, my future girlfriend, best friend, fiancée, and my future. She opened a gate and we hugged, without hesitation or question. I felt her heart beat through her chest, through her shirt, and onto me, through my shirt, and into my heart. It fell into me. Without a moment of hesitation. She spoke with elegance yet as if with a story of rigid edges. She was strong, as if she had been through rough times without ever making you feel her weight. She radiated strength, intelligence and courage. It was intriguing. It memorized me. It still memorizing me. I spoke to her for hours alongside a pool of an apartment complex. The pool where I proposed to her 6 months later. We spoke of ourselves. The colorful vapor less aura that she pronounced onto her surroundings, stunned me. I had never met anyone like this. I had never allowed myself to accept greatness in a woman. I allowed myself to be thankful and deserving of a gift of god given to me that day. She radiates light, that has guided me, supported me, surprised me, amused me, strengthened me, loved me, encouraged me, stood by me, and a light that has won my heart. Every fiber of my heart loves her. She’s part of my way now, she is part of the way I see life. I see family, kids and a future. I have become selfless for her. I have grown into a woman alongside her. I have learned the true meaning of love because of her. I have stumbled but have gotten up with her beside me. I have learned what a love is, not a storybook love, yet a true undeniable unconditional love. I am irrevocably in love with this woman. And I will love her forever, far beyond death, and heaven and hell, far past what our minds can imagine and what the books say is possible. I will love her forever. This heart will beat till its last day for her, but this soul will thrive for her endlessly.
Now that’s a beauty.